Dysfunctions of the Military Parent 2

If you strongly believe that your child’s behavior

is a direct reflection on you and your capability, you may unwittingly be turning into a Military parent. Such family environments are characterized by over regimentation, strict rules that must never be broken and rigid principles. Here discipline is valued over self expression.

Children are taught to be seen not heard,

they must always be polite, nor give vent to angry or disruptive emotions and they are expected to live by strong boundaries peppered liberally with do’s and don’ts.

The child learns to stifle his feelings

and lives in repression becoming a puppet to the commands of an overbearing mother or father and learns not to trust his own judgement or depend on himself. They grow up feeling a loss of personal power and expect to be navigated and controlled even into adulthood.

They end up, most often, trying to please

other people even at the cost of harming themselves. They develop weak personal boundaries and find it very hard to say no. What is particularly alarming is that these children lose their voice and self expression.

Sadly enough several cases of child abuse

belong to this category as these children fear telling their parents about the trauma they may be undergoing and instead choose to live in shame and self hatred.

If you wish to unleash your child’s true potential,

don’t let your discipline kill his or her expression. Allow them to develop confidence in their own selves and become self expressed so that they can navigate their lives with ease as grow into strong, self reliant adults.

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