Heaven On Earth?

Years ago I emerged from my mother’s womb battling,

crying and resisting being born. I had to be dragged out of the womb with the help of forceps. I’m told I used to cry a lot as a child and it took a long journey through consciousness to discover the reasons why it was so hard for me to leave my true home in the Godly planes and descend onto this school of learning to refine my soul, assist others to find the Light and gather valuable soul lessons so I could return back home, rich with the harvest of my earthly experiences to my indescribably beautiful God.

Floating particles of light in the darkness

drew my attention for years in my childhood. All unseen, unspoken mystical things fascinated me. My inner world was very different from the one I encountered outside.

I remember being frightened by death as a child, as also car crashes and bus accidents on lonely dark Punjab highway roads. I had a peculiar relationship with the dark. It was pristine when the stars shone through and scary when shadows of pain, harshness and negativity marred the beauty of pure darkness.

I talked to the stars often

as I lay under a naked sky with my grandfather on his terrace and he trained my eye to see the various constellations and astrological formations. I believed I could talk to the stars and they would guide me and whisper their secrets to me. I found earth to be cold. Except in my grandmothers embrace where I felt Gods presence.

She was the epitome of everything I knew

to be home where I had come from. Joy, compassion, an unending ability to give without ever wanting anything in return, courage born of silence and forgiveness came naturally and spontaneously to her. She was everything that God could possibly be if he were to be here on earth.

I do hope that somewhere in those heavenly planes she is listening to these thoughts of mine as I scribble them, for her love transcends time and space and I know she was and is my guardian angel, guiding, nurturing and pushing me to learn, grow and evolve with every breath that I take.

Today I sense a strange new energy

engulfing me; as though I am being born again, having finished a long and tiring journey I feel like I am resting in the Lords light, empowered and equipped to carry forth his legacy that he has entrusted me with. I know not why I call it a legacy except that the word is resonating powerfully in my mind. My training is complete I am told.

I feel myself brimming with joy as though new well springs have been unleashed within me by his grace. The sky looks more resplendent and my body feels almost weightless. Am I real? I have to pinch myself to know. Am I really still on earth? Is this heaven? How can heaven be on earth, I wonder? And then I hear the Lord say, when I fill you up, heaven can be on any place, even on earth.

And just so I might believe these holographic messages

swarming in from the universe I had a friend of 30 odd years or more, call and say some of the strangest things to me. We were speaking to each other after almost a decade. She perhaps was the only one who saw me through the pathos of my dark nights and had seen me through more than I can attempt to describe or even care to recall.

Through the strange buzzing of my speaker phone

I heard her say, Suzy if only you could see yourself through my eyes you would be wonder struck at what you see. I wasn’t sure if I had heard her right but she repeated herself even without my prompting as though she were reading my thoughts. As her words sank in I wondered whether it was her or God trying to tell me something.

I silently thanked her soul

for bringing Gods message to me. It humbled me to hear her speak. Not once but many times in her conversation she reiterated telling me that I was so complete. And then it occurred, I realized complete was how I was feeling today. Complete in the Lords embrace.

Another soul family member called

a little later to wish and ask if anyone had prayed with me today and I laughed saying, oh no, I always pray alone. And she asked, can I pray with you, for you? We prayed on the phone together, miles apart and yet so close, tears pouring down my face in sheer joy. I felt God touching me in more ways than I can possibly capture in words.

And I am only half way into my birthday yet. I know I no longer need to resist being on earth. God is right here. He speaks to me through people, through the wind, through the seven musical notes, through the flowers at my bedside, through the silence of stillness, through the sun at dawn and the stars at night.

Today I feel Gods presence

like never before. Today I know for sure that I am truly blessed.

17 July 2013

 

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