How Can I Be Happy?

Q:  I am 35 year old who somehow has lost all hope in life.

I don’t remember when was I really happy last time. I have been labelled as a negative thinking personality, which I too agree is right. I and my family have reached to a stage of frustration where somehow I feel that they will be better off without me. My biggest concern is my 5 year old daughter who is growing up with such unhappy mother. I am clueless how to bring back some life and happiness in me. I don’t want to declare myself depressed or mentally unstable but slowly and steadily I am believing that I am heading towards it.

I do want help and just not sure what and where to ask for. Could you please advise if you are able to help me change as a bit positive person and learn to be happy…

Regards

A: Dear N

1. Having lost touch with your inner core

and inner joy you are being tossed around on the rude seas of what people think about you. This is the surest way to crush joy and trust me even the strongest of people drown in the sea of what others think of me.

You are aching for someone to love you and understand you but that can only happen when you love and respect yourself. Gather you self respect, reconstruct your life and learn to love yourself more by adhering to the following advice, and believe me your life will begin to change.

2. Take one small thing at a time and live

one day at a time. Start by choosing to transform your life because you are tired of being miserable. (Question is are you really? This is an important question you must ask yourself.) Declare out loud and affirm each day my life is getting better and better.

3. Follow the 3P’s principle.

Passion, purpose & potential. First find something you are Passionate about. Even simple things like cooking, or other things you were good at in school or college. Using these ideas make a list of things you can do each day to bring you joy. Do at least one thing you like each day like listening to music etc. Find and create 30 minutes of My time which is the time you nourish your soul, pamper and indulge yourself. This is something outside the routine of your daily boring duties. Something you do only to fulfill yourself.

4. When you have spent a few days engaging

in things you are passionate about, see how you can make these more Purposeful. Make them larger like a dream come true. Example- if you enjoy cooking, can you start your blog, you can start a home catering business or sending tiffins to an office or even sharing recipes on face book where people can use and acknowledge your talents.

5. Next build your Potential

in that chosen sphere of interest and develop your expertise further. Join some classes, learn and grow further.

6. Meet people, don’t isolate yourself,

that will only make you more miserable and rudderless. When you are finding your way out of depression you need support. Meet with neighbors, go to a coffee bar with a friend or just visit the super market for a change of scene. Get out for a breath of fresh air and please don’t talk about whats wrong with your life. Talk about things that inspire you. Know that what you put your attention on grows so avoid brooding about your troubles. Ignore them.

7. Think of and relive happy memories.

Each time you do that you refresh the screen page of your present life and bring some joy into it. Get in touch with old school friends that you shared happy times with or meet up with some of your closer cousins that you grew up with.

8. Life is too precious to throw away.

Start by following the 3 P’s route of building passion, purpose and potential and see your life changing. It wont be easy but trust me it will be worth the trouble. All you need to do is practice this advice with dedication for 40 days.

If are in are Delhi and need to book a healing appointment with me you call on 9810246158 or else send me an email to request for a skype booking if you live elsewhere in the world.

Please read my blog article on this site titled The Teaching Shoe for more guidance & clarity.